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Merrimack Valley Magazine

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A View From the Kitchen – Stress Rides Shotgun

March 20, 2021 by Scott Plath

Prosecco sure. Lambrusco, naturally. But the fizz on my tongue incited by our pinot noir was suspect. We were thrilled to have scored four stools along the outside of the square inside-outside bar of a bustling French brasserie in Naples, Florida. After multiple sips, it took a few of my well-honed cool-guy, upward “Hey bartender” head nods to finally alert busy-him to my urgent dilemma. After all, the foie with port-poached figs was due at any moment. Such fun! His own well-honed “customer is always right” response comforted. With “Let’s do this” face, he plucked a fresh bottle from the center bar and opened it with practiced efficiency. He presented a new glass and poured some sample ounces, deftly twirling his bottle while simultaneously wiping its lip and stepping back at black-vested attention. “Same,” I frowned, opting for my confused puppylike face versus my bougie wine snob frown. I was clueless. With stubborn intention, he repeated the entire action. New glass, new bottle, head cocked: “Sir?” 

Swirl, sip … “Weird. Maybe it’s me?” He grabbed yet another bottle with such commitment that I wondered if he was mocking me just a bit. One in our group suggested the whole case was tainted. I now wondered aloud whether the (extraordinary) Gorgonzola in our (excellent) honey crisp apple-endive-walnut salad was maybe reacting with the wine. Those kooky bleus. I shrugged and decided to stick with it — three bottles deep and simply stoked to be dining again among happy, shiny people.

 

Then, a thing happened. Dude lowered his mask before orating upon minerality in wine.

My “at risk” friends gasped. We noted later with faux offense that our hot and hustling bartenders stopped throughout dinner to share bits of hospitality, each time lowering their masks. “Where the hell are we right now?” we wondered. The patio was full. The bar, full. The dining room, too, while the sidewalk bustled with diners waiting. “There’s no COVID here” we joked throughout multiple restaurant visits in the Sunshine State. “They missed the memo!” The joyful guest and former “prisoner” in me was tickled by the abundant normalcy while the Northern restaurant owner in me cried inside each time. Why can’t we, too, be in denial? Why can’t we, too, calculate risk for ourselves?

We had gone “over the wall,” escaping the confinement of extremely cautionary, cold, and oft-depressing Massachusetts for a grand buffet of alternate reality — the “wild west” of Florida. Having personally never been overly concerned about getting the virus (call me what you will), I indeed got it months ago. It is theorized that I then passed it to family members as we met in my small condo and projected our restaurant group “decision tree” on my TV — analyzing worst- to best-case scenarios. We all promptly quarantined, suffered mild flu symptoms and mostly recovered in days. I was relieved by both getting it and getting over it — and that my loved ones did, too, as we padded the growing numbers of those who went from “positive” to recovered. I hopped a flight weeks later feeling liberated, excited, guilty and burdened with business no better off and eternally fearing the worst — be it someone becoming ill, another unaffordable repair bill, or another press conference, each one a kick in our industry ass.

At first, it felt wrong to leave our struggling teams behind, perpetually perplexed as to what else we could be doing to positively influence fractional, static sales. In my heart, the answer had been confirmed over the past year. Very little. And trust me, the stress rides shotgun — chattering morning, noon and night. There is no true escape. Conversely, the potential for discovery travels, too. The reality is, while working from Florida the comfort of warmth and a rogue community (call it what you wish) proved a welcome breather when all the tossing and turning, reading, researching, emailing, zooming, and staring into the sunny abyss came to the end of the day. Freedom rings. 

When I shared my observations on our Facebook pages, I inspired dissension — the best kind, as I am mostly connected to intelligent, thoughtful and respectful “friends.” (Whom I pray are avoiding the absolute poisoning of our society by Facebook’s pursuit of profit. A column for another day.*) I asked how was it that per capita, “the numbers” in living-life Florida were reportedly better than locked-down Massachusetts. Comments followed. “Density,” one friend theorized. “That’s bullshit,” dropped another. “Florida fudges their numbers.” “They test less.” “How does anyone know that Florida isn’t reporting true numbers?” And so it went. This debate rages on because there is limited absolute truth — we all have varied core values and beliefs while the science continuously evolves. Yes, we should protect one another. And yes, we should have control over our own fate. (And reporting false numbers should face harsh penalties!) Personally, I am reminded of a Virginia Woolf quote from a favorite movie scene: “This is my right; it is the right of every human being. I choose not the suffocating anesthetic of the suburbs, but the violent jolt of the Capital, that is my choice.” Here is wishing good luck and good health to both the safekeepers and the risk takers, and sunnier days ahead for us all.  

*I recommend “The Social Dilemma” on Netflix — an eye-opening portrayal of how social media is negatively impacting our society.

Filed Under: Food & Drink Tagged With: COVID, Debate, Dining, Facebook, florida, Restaurant, Scott Plath, Stress

A View from the Kitchen – The Paradise of Mindlessness

July 9, 2019 by Scott Plath Leave a Comment

“Trump” lied in representing the losers’ team: “You cheated. Amberjack is not edible.” It was his second justification for their refusal to pay the full bet that he proposed hours earlier: $100 for the largest keeper. He circled our beer-laden beachside dinner table, tossing each of us five winners a 10-dollar bill — his nickname bestowed on a previous trip to the Keys, when that name was synonymous with huckster businessman. 

We were at a restaurant in Islamorada, Florida, that prepares and serves the fish that folks catch and bring to the chef.

“You’re the cheat!” we charged in (mostly) mock offense. “The first mate kept it for his dinner.” I crumpled my bill and chucked it at his smirky, sunburned face. “Keep your dirty money, loser!”

As the bill skipped between tables, my comical and opportunistic brother dove from his plastic chair into the white sand, insuring that one didn’t get away. At an adjacent table, a wary pregnant diner beheld our grown man lying on the beach, cradling Alexander Hamilton’s crinkled image as we howled. 

“Your brother’s a fool,” observed our high school chum — not the first to have uttered those words over the past three days. It was like that. Ten guys, hot sun, ongoing “hydration,” successive late nights, early mornings, more beverages … 

Our “Hooked” fishing derby, named and inspired years earlier by a soon-to-be-married brother-in-law, provides an annual opportunity to park free of alternative suggestions in whatever spot we choose, to leave wet towels on furniture without reprisal, to power down and go off the grid, to insult each other liberally — without worry of someone becoming offended or unfriended — to be generally boy-stupid.

We arrived from Massachusetts, New York and throughout the Sunshine State. Excited to hook up with one of the most respected captains in this renowned fishing mecca — Skip Bradeen of Blue Chip Too — we ultimately headed toward the Atlantic sunrise in 1- to 2-foot seas and perfect conditions. 

Throughout the day, we appreciated the expertise and intense hustle of the captain and first mate, who impressed us from the git by perfectly pinwheeling a casting net multiple times onto a blank and giant sea, pulling a “boatload” of bait each time. (I was further humored by the irony that one species of baitfish was called ballyhoo.) Baited hooks were consistently at the ready, the mate was 4 for 4 with the gaff, and despite the local buzz that the fish weren’t biting Skip put us on point multiple times throughout the day, proving excellent at knowing when to “cut bait” and move to a better fish-bearing location. 

With plenty in the hold, the day waning and fingers crossed that our yellowfin tuna would be the champ, we anchored at a final “secret spot” where I soon hooked what proved to be the easy winner — though considerably less easy to boat. Resisting from 300 feet down, the amberjack powerfully objected, dragging the reel frequently the entire time. 

Back on shore, the old dock scale said 23 pounds, though it felt “more like 30.” (Next year, I’m certain it will be reported closer to 40. As a close friend said: “The older we get, the better we were.”)

After a shower and an hour of resting tired forearms and backs, we arrived at Lazy Days, a local restaurant with an outdoor bar feet from the Gulf’s edge.

As the sun set and the staff delivered platters of our grouper, mahi-mahi, tuna and snapper — in soy sauce and ginger, jalapeno encrusted and pan-blackened, Southern fried, and the house recipe pepper sauce — our, hmm, ballyhoo quickly turned to more focused hungry and grateful groans. We eagerly shared a bounty twice what we could eat, after having already given half of our catch to the crew.

Days of insufficient sleep, the southernmost sun, losing nearly as many fish as we landed, and continuous waves of laughter with a bunch of favorite idiots is the perfect recipe for an extraordinary dinner. So. Damn. Good.

On our final tired and hazy day, the consensus was for a relaxed airboat tour of the Everglades, foregoing the inherent “dangers” lurking at a nearby casino. Our Native American guide, Christian Tigertail, immersed us into this incredibly unique, wild-yet-fragile ecosystem, its history, how it was originally settled by various people fleeing one thing or another, the vanishing mammal population, all things alligator (including their unique reproductive gear), and the many fish swimming around our boat, such as “gar,” as one among us defined as inedible. Our guide corrected: “We eat them all the time. But we won’t eat the catfish that the locals love.” “Trump” winked.

And then from the back my brother shouted, “Let’s hear more about alligator cloaca,” … to yet another round of tired, foolish laughter — a big fat nap whispering my name.

Scott Plath, along with his wife Kathleen, owns Cobblestones of Lowell and moonstones, in Chelmsford, Mass. Scott possesses a deep well of humorous and insightful stories, which are available on this website.

Filed Under: Food & Drink Tagged With: boat, fishing, florida, Restaurant

COBBLESTONES Restaurant & Bar

91 Dutton Street, Lowell, MA 01852
Website
Directions
(978) 970-2282
Read More →

COBBLESTONES Restaurant & Bar

A historic landmark, COBBLESTONES boasts excellent dining and hospitality amongst magnificent architecture and ambiance. Widely known for incredible hand cut steaks, burgers, local seafood and oysters on the 1/2 shell, 25 years worth of Chef created specialties, classic American cocktails and dozens of locally crafted beers. Equally suited for casual tavern fare or special private dining celebrations. "A must" in the Merrimack Valley. Kitchen Hours: Mon.–Sun. 12pm-11pm. (Award winning Sunday Brunch @ 10:15am). Bar until midnight Fri. & Sat. 91 Dutton Street / Lowell, Mass. / (978) 970-2282 / CobblestonesOfLowell.com
Address
91 Dutton Street, Lowell, MA 01852
Website
Directions
(978) 970-2282
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